Brokenhearted

She rubs her fingers back and forth as she sits and listens to the topic of motherhood being discussed. Her hope of having a child has vanished after trying for many years. Even after turning to adoption, her baby has not yet arrived. No one will know of her pain because she sits in silence. Alone in a room full of other women, she holds her hands tightly to prevent the tears from cascading down her face without ceasing. Afraid in her pain, she remains alone as she goes unnoticed.

~  ~  ~

Sitting with his classmates, the little boy focused his attention on the teacher introducing sign language to the class. With excitement he held his hands in front of him and moved his fingers as best he could to mimic the teacher. She moved from word to word before demonstrating the sign for Dad. With a sad disposition, his hands fell to his lap. He did not know his Dad. He did not know what it was like for all the other boys and girls to have their hands high and proud to sign for the man that hugged and kissed them before sleep each night. His idle hands brought attention to him for not participating. With his heart crushed, laughter followed the teacher’s correction. His pain singled him out and made him feel less than everyone around him.

~  ~  ~

Often, pain goes unnoticed and is added to from our anxieties, fears or simply not knowing how to move past the pain. The mix of feelings is hard to control. As life continues to move along, our mind attempts to keep up with circling circumstances and we feel like we are playing dodge ball. If we are hit one more time, we aren’t sure we will be able to keep it all together. Our broken spirit may rage within us to allow our emotion to demonstrate outwardly with anger for all to see.  

We move so fast trying to avoid our own pain often times, we miss the pain in others to unintentionally increase their sadness and provoke our own. Or worse, we remain frozen in our own little world, unresponsive to any signs of help or other’s attempts to make us feel better.

Take the woman longing for a child. Her desires have isolated her. So much so, she is fearful to ask for help in a room full of women who can probably relate to her. Not only did she and others capable of helping miss out on an opportunity, she opened herself to unintentional and avoidable pain of hearing others describe the joys of motherhood she can’t experience. She is likely to fault the other women and perhaps miss out on a meaningful relationship.

The poor child without a father at such a young age feels rejection, inadequate and unloved. Because the one person he wants to show him love and attention is void from his life, he will make others feel as horrible as he feels with inappropriate talk and actions. With all the odds against him from a problem he can’t control, how is he to do any good in a single day or worse, his life?

Jesus.

No pain is greater than the power of Jesus. His compassion blankets the brokenhearted as His love seeps into each crack that has split the broken heart. Pain and damage unseen to us is completely visible to Jesus. But how does His redeeming power reach the hopeless, guilt filled men and women and innocent little boys and girls?

You.

We each have our own pain – pain that is not unique. Our pain tells a good story and sometimes could even be a great manuscript for the big screen, but no story is finished until it has experienced the hand of Jesus. Until it has His fingerprints of divine redemption, it is incomplete. There is more to be written. The plot has not even begun to twist because the Author of Good has not been written in. He is our expert and we need to write Jesus into any story we can. Allowing Jesus to work and edit the script is what every sad, hopeless and anger filled story needs. Compassion. Grace. Peace. Forgiveness.

Where do you come in? You have the ability and opportunity to use your pain to relate to the hurting by sharing your story and introducing them to the kindness of Jesus. Guide them toward compassion, grace and forgiveness. Encourage them to open up, despite their fears and anxieties. Give them a safe opportunity to say what hurts out loud and audaciously ask for help from others who understand. Most importantly, you can teach them to pray to the God who redeems. Inspire Godly and righteous change because you too have had to make changes in your life moving past the grizzliest of guilt and maneuver through the most unlikely circumstances. Begin a movement of love because you know what it is like to feel unappreciated, unwanted and rejected.

I am not talking about starting a church or leading a new ministry in the one you already attend. If only another woman would have seen the nervous hands and gently sat beside the woman to personally engage with her and alleviate the hindrance of the group setting. If only the little boy had a teacher who showed him a little extra love while the others played at recess and she remembered him in her daily prayers. Or better yet, what if another child was taught to love and noticed his new friend needed someone to invite him over to play? Sometimes it is as easy as paying a little extra attention and being a little more intentional to demonstrate the compassion and love of Jesus.

Start at home with the ones you love. Acknowledge their pain as a real struggle they face daily. Open room for true conversations with humble and grace filled responses lacking judgment. Be kind to those you share hallways with beyond your home. Pray and ask God for opportunities to share His Word with others. In that same prayer, ask God to open your willingness to be used by Him so your hurts may be further healed while others begin healing because of your steps of faithfulness. Ask God that they too will reach out to others experiencing pain so an abundance of lost and hurting people experience the acceptance, understanding and redemptive hand of God.

If you are the hurting, pray God would send someone to you who is looking for someone to share God’s love with.

God you are so very good to us. Please help us to apply you more in the places you seem muted. Encourage us not to sit idle in our pain. Help us to see past faults or differences hindering us to respect others as a child of God suffering from the same fallen world. For all those who don’t yet know you, I pray the words and boldness of your followers would speak loud and follow the movements of your Spirit so more and more people would know your true love. It is in Jesus redeeming name I pray. Amen.

“Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.” –Matthew 11:28