Love Jesus Out Loud

I think the word serving can scare people away by the thought of having to do something for someone else or perhaps the free labor involved. The Bible describes a servant as one who performs a variety of work to serve other people out of obedience because of their love and thanksgiving for God. Numerous scripture refer to serving and also provide examples for us to learn from. The most prominent and life changing example is from Christ himself.

Philippians 2 tells us to Love Jesus Out Loud.

We are called to love like Jesus. Because of our selfish human nature, our hearts must be locked to Christ. Only then are we able to grow a tender heart compassionate for one another so we are able to “work hard to show the results of our salvation.”

This picture may look like a bunch of happy kids dressed in red from head to toe with some signs, firemen hats and lots of energy, but there is more to this picture than meets the eye. I see kids holding signs with very powerful words they themselves live out. I have seen these kids walk up to strangers who are visiting for the first time so they feel accepted at church. I have seen some of these kids stand on stage and sing their heart out to lead worship. I have heard these kids share deep and personal things in their life with others to show why we need Jesus. I have seen some of these kids grow physically, mentally and spiritually.

What you don’t see in the picture is the sweet girl that helped make posters. She is a girl that opts out of worship time and time again. She works to find distractions during sermons. She is not so sure about the whole God thing.  Not only can you not see the girl I’m talking about in the photo, you can’t see her elated joy, involvement and excitement at church all weekend. Pictures do not tell the whole story. Serving does. Getting involved does.

This weekend our church hosted our annual Youth Student Conference and I had the great privilege to serve and be with God’s children. This is not the first year I have dedicated my weekend to this event, but it was the most meaningful by far. I found myself out of my comfort zone talking to kids I didn’t know. I was engaged with some I met for the first time and some I have known for years. It is not necessarily normal for kids in middle and high school to spend time with adults when they have the option of being with their friends. Let alone an adult as shy, reserved and rule following as me. But there I was. With them and their friends - as one of the girls. I did not have to try to be what I thought they wanted me to be. I did not have to focus my thoughts on whether or not they would like me. It was not about me.

Had I not served and dedicated my entire weekend to this student conference, I would not have seen true joy in hearts I know are broken. I saw some dance I have only dreamed to see happy enough to dance. I saw some that live with trial and conflict every day let loose and not only have fun - they entertained others. I saw some worship as tears fell from their precious eyes. The atmosphere was contagious. Nothing, I mean nothing will compare to witnessing so many children radiate from God’s love.

This picture is an absolute token to me. The most glaring awesomeness is being in a photo with Bob Goff himself. He is an amazing speaker and exudes cheerfulness of his love for God. For me, Bob is not the most momentous part of this picture. The girls and the time we spent together captured in this picture is what I take away as a treasure. I have known these girls since they were in the 6^th grade and I am blown away at by the impression they leave on my heart. This picture hides one of my good friends. She too is a student and we had a moment. Many tears fell and Jesus was very much needed and to no surprise, He showed up. In celebration just before this picture we danced and worshiped together as they adorned me with confetti that fell from the ceiling. Together we sat and listened to Bob Goff speak. Bob is amazing. He has this laugh that makes the girls laugh and love him more with each chuckle. It was a gift to experience it with them as we shared seats so we all fit together. For the first time I did not see the back of their heads or hear the general laughs of the auditorium. I heard their individual laughs and witnessed the pure joy on their face in the moment. Bob gets excited with his words, his glasses even jump around when he speaks. The girls just loved it. The personality that oozed from Bob was spread from person to person. The girls even tried to imitate his laugh so they could take a bit of him home I think. 

I said yes to the Lord a few years ago when He nudged me to serve with the students at church on a weekly basis. Because of mistakes and experiences in my life, I grew a passion to do what I could to help love and teach students. I have an intense love for guiding students toward Jesus and teaching them ways to live with God daily despite the world telling them otherwise. For me, this is what serving is. I do not see it as a job or having to do something I don’t want to do. I try to do it with all I have because God tells me to. It has been hard. So many times I felt like quitting or defeated, but God always picks me back up to affirm He has me right were I need to be.  There is no room for quitting. The girl that made posters needs people in her life to continue her on the path of receiving Jesus Christ as her Lord and Savior. There is work to be done for there are many just like her.

Three years ago at the same event, there was no way I had the courage to walk up to a group of kids I did not know with a smile to engage with them. I have learned when you say yes to God to serve His people, He begins to work in your life. He makes great change within you to transform and equip to serve Him better. He doesn’t send us empty handed. He doesn’t send us alone. Not only that, God rewards us in ways incomparable to money or to any earthy award. There are no words to describe the feeling that overcame me when I saw a young man give his life to Christ and be surrounded by other guys with hugs of support and love. Had I stayed in the back where I feel most comfortable, I would have missed so much.

For every child that smiled back, thank you! Thank you for Setting the Tone in my heart to encourage me to Love Jesus Out Loud.

 “Be Not Afraid” – Bob Goff

Have the Attitude of Christ

Is there any encouragement from belonging to Christ? Any comfort from his love? Any fellowship together in the Spirit? Are your hearts tender and compassionate? Then make me truly happy by agreeing wholeheartedly with each other, loving one another, and working together with one mind and purpose.

Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. Don’t look out only for your own interests, but take an interest in others, too. You must have the same attitude that Christ Jesus had.

Though he was God,

he did not think of equality with God

as something to cling to.

Instead, he gave up his divine privileges;

he took the humble position of a slave

and was born as a human being.

When he appeared in human form,

he humbled himself in obedience to God

and died a criminal’s death on a cross.

Therefore, God elevated him to the place

of highest honor and gave him the name above all other names,

that at the name of Jesus every knee

should bow;

in heaven and on earth and under

the earth,

and every tongue declare that Jesus Christ is Lord,

to the glory of God the Father.

Shine Brightly for Christ

Dear friends, you always followed my instructions when I was with you. And now that I am away, it is even more important. Work hard to show the results of your salvation, obeying God with deep reverence and fear. For God is working in you, giving you the desire and power to do what pleases him.

Do everything without complaining and arguing, so that no one can criticize you. Live clean, innocent lives as children of God, shining like bright lights in a world full of crooked and perverse people. Hold firmly to the word of life; then, on the day of Christ’s return, I will be proud that I did not run the race in vain and that my work was not useless. But I will rejoice even if I lose my life, pouring it out like a liquid offering to God, just like your faithful service is an offering to God. And I want all of you to share that joy. Yes, you should rejoice, and I will share your joy. 

– Philippians 2:1-18 (NLT)

Seed Drill

I went to church Sunday morning expecting to hear of how to approach each workday better as we continued a series titled Made for Monday. God had a different message for me to hear. Pastor Paul so beautifully described how God created the most meaningful work. Hearing his sermon left me to contemplate how important it is for me to sow spiritual seeds and how I wrongfully let so many irrelevant things get in the way. As Paul finished his sermon, God tugged on my heart. “To remember Jesus is to rededicate to Him. Jesus had an ugly and dirty job, but He gave it his all and did it out of a heart of love. Jesus did not look forward to his work, he knew it would be hard, but he did it.”

I need to rededicate myself to Jesus and what is important to Christ. His grace and love was not meant to stop with me.

Then the band began to lead us into communion. The drums pounded the message further into my chest. The music began to stick in my mind like glue. The words spoke to my heart and circulated within me. My thirsty soul was watered as a dry and desperate flower feels each drop of water pouring over it. Wilted no more a beautiful blossom from a seed once placed.

Psalm 96:3 tells us we are called to “tell everyone about the amazing things he does.”

In the farming industry, Seed Drills are large machines designed to do the hard work of planting seeds for crops to grow. What is interesting about these machines is they not only drop the seed, they also cover each one in the soil so the seed doesn’t fly astray. It is important to cover the seed with rich soil so it grows to become a part of the crop as intended. We must cover the spiritual seeds we plant in others with prayer. Prayer can activate the Holy Spirit. Prayer can soften a heart. Prayer can make the impossible very possible. God will cultivate the seeds if we plant and fertilize them with prayer.

Pastor Paul was a vessel of God. Not because he has a large stage to stand on and hundreds of people come to hear his preaching, but because he prayed. He asked God to work through Him. Had he not been so connected with God in prayer and readiness with the Lord, the words would have fallen short. Instead His words were delivered as if from God himself. I am not sure if others in the room felt God the way I did, but it was just what I needed to be reminded I too am a vessel for God to work through. . . We all are!

It is about being ready to do God’s work at any moment. It is about being free of self-doubt, status, bank accounts and fear. God puts things on our hearts and works in mysterious ways in our lives for a reason. If we keep God a secret, who will know of His majesty and power? The blessing would stop with us. How sad. God’s blessings are so richly designed for sharing to be infused in others. Don’t worry if you share, God won’t run out of the good stuff. When we share, it makes believing and having faith meaningful.

Verses of scripture like Mark 16:15 can seem intimidating for it says, “Go into all the world and preach the Good News to everyone.” Perhaps these words seem as if they were meant for someone other than self, leaving feelings of self-doubt or a lack of knowledge and experience to stop us dead in our tracks. That is what Satan wants you to think so a flood of people feel unfit and incapable of spreading the Good News. Preaching simply means to teach and we do not have to stand behind a pulpit to teach for others to learn.

Plant God's seed to see His beauty grow

Sometimes preaching the Good News is just being kind because it may be the only kindness a person has in their day. Follow it up with a prayer. Pray the person would have their mind blown because of repeated experiences representing God’s kindness and love leading them to Christ. Some preaching and seed planting will find you in more intense and Bible focused conversations. Perhaps you will surprisingly share personal accounts of God from your own life. Each person is different. Each seed is different. Just as the soil has to be turned to receive the seed, a heart has to be prepared to receive its spiritual seed.

Nothing is too small or insignificant if done in and for the glory of God. If you are living by example to model a relationship with Christ you can plant a seed. When I was a young child, I remember my mom’s notepad and loose papers randomly placed throughout the yellow pages of the pad. It slightly resembled a pile of trash or the inside of a middle school locker to me. I later learned the pile was not trash at all. It was all the prayer requests she had received and the prayers she was actively praying over. I didn’t really understand as young kid what all the kneeling and whispers were. I didn’t realize her weekly bible study and dedicated talks with the Lord were her planting a seed in me. Because of God’s work through the Holy Spirit in me, her seed was cultivated into a deep and personal relationship with Christ.

Imagine for a moment you are in Heaven. You have had your moments with the Lord, been reunited with your friends and family and then there are people standing in line waiting to thank you. Some of these people you may not recognize. Others will bring joy and thanksgiving to swirl inside you. They shake your hand, hug you and are in celebration with you. The seed you planted in their soul ultimately led them to spending an eternity with Christ.

What we do on this earth matters. Regardless of our circumstances, money, and the things of the world distracting us, we are designed to do God’s work and share the Good News. When we are celebrating in Heaven the things of this earth will not be important. True joy will be witnessing all of the many souls in Heaven because of the seeds your Seed Drill planted.

God I am so sorry. Because of your work, I am rescued yet I act as though I need more. Please forgive me Father. Lord, help me to have a heart of love just as Jesus did. Help me Lord to live a life to model hard scripture like Mark 16:15 so you may receive all of the glory and more beautiful souls will be introduced personally to your love and acceptance. I pray this prayer for all who read these words and those who receive a spiritual seed because of them in Jesus name. Amen.

I planted the seed in your hearts, and Apollos watered it, but it was God who made it grow. It is not important who does the planting, or who does the watering. What’s important is that God makes the seed grow. The one who plants and the one who waters work together with the same purpose. And both will be rewarded for their own hard work. – 1 Corinthians 3:6-8 (NLT)

May he equip you with all you need for doing his will. May he produce in you, through the power of Jesus Christ, every good thing that is pleasing to him. All glory to him forever and ever! Amen. – Hebrews 13:21 (NLT)

God Won't Let Me Quit

I started my day early. The alarm went off just before 6 am. I was proud of myself for not hitting snooze and falling back to sleep. Instead, I got up and on the treadmill. I read some scripture, listened to some worship music and before 7 am I felt ready. I was even intentional the night before to go to bed early so I could get all the items on the to do list marked off so I could sit down and focus my time on work. Without having a 9-5 job and a preschool facility for my son, intentionality is a must to make time for writing or it will never happen. Writing is not something that is forced on me. Everything else will seem as though it is forced on me if I allow the tasks and requests to bog me down and steal all the minutes the day holds.

I drove my daughter to school early as she requested and made my way home now focused on a little school time with my son. The day before had been successful in every way during our instructional time, but I soon discovered today was a new day. He was not at all cooperating and testing every bit of new patience. Soon the day started to melt down only 3 short hours after it started. After a complete misunderstanding with my husband I was angry and any thing but agreeable. Suddenly my focus was laser pointed on all the wrongdoing around me and completely oblivious to my own behavior.

Have you ever wanted to quit?

I JUST WANT TO QUIT!

The words came out of my mouth not once, but several times. They didn’t even seem wrong. It was exactly how I felt.

“This is just too hard!”

And just like that I was in no place to do God’s work.

I had to leave the house for an appointment so I packed my laptop bag and purse with the intention of doing something productive after the appointment. As I drove out of the driveway and away from home, my mind was fixated – QUIT! As I drove a little further my thoughts almost immediately began to shift as the Holy Spirit began to work in me. I started to think about how the audience on my blog has increased. The voice whispering QUIT was now overshadowed. You can't quit.  Even just one more visitor reading the words inspired by God is reason enough to keep going. As I continued driving I sat in silence. No radio. No phone calls or texts. I talked to God and told Him I knew I couldn’t quit, but it was so hard and I asked for His help. After following the commands of the GPS while driving in a part of town I do not frequent, I looked to the left and noticed the bakery where it all started. The bakery is where dear friends from bible study encouraged me to follow my passion and implanted a burning desire to follow God’s calling. I vividly remembered the warm summer night standing in the parking lot as my calling seemed so clear and even possible. A tear left my eye as I drove by. I felt the visual reminder as an answer to the prayer I had just prayed moments ago. YOU CAN’T QUIT. As I sat in the waiting room for my name to be called, I placed my laptop on my lap. With my mind completely fixated on God and the situation at hand, I wrote these words:

“Realizing this is not about me has been painful. I have wanted to quit before. More than once, but today it is different. Today I even said the words out loud because the attacks of Satan have been overwhelming. Painful. The attacks are like daggers in the heart that wear my mind out. I know support cannot solely come from those of this earth, but it still hurts when people let me down. No fault to them. They are not You. I know I have to seek You. As rewarding and comforting as seeking You can be, it is hard when demonic attacks are strong. Earlier my mind repeated. Quit. Quit. This is too hard. Tears formed, but I did not allow them to fall. As I drove the words penetrated within me. I knew they did not belong, but felt I did not have the power to remove them.  I know I need your help."

After the appointment, I sat in my car and looked over my phone that sat silent in my purse since I left the house. The prayer request waiting for me was yet another attempt from the evil one to bring down a friend and her family. It pained me to hear of the hurt and reminded me I was not alone in the demonic attempts to take our focus off of God. The prayer request was very personal, vulnerable and immediately closed my eyes in prayer. You aren’t the only one suffering from the attacks. People you need you Rachel. You can’t quit.

Then I got a wild hair to make the drive to visit my grandfather in the nursing home. I was supposed to work on my book the remainder of the day, but the visit seemed to be more important. Following GPS once more in silence and prayer, I decided to turn the radio on. The words spoken in the song spoke to my heart as if they were from God himself. The comfort of being held in His presence whispered yet again. You can’t quit.

I surprised my grandfather and had a memorable one on one time with him. As if that was not gift enough, I had the opportunity of having lunch with my grandmother – just the two of us. The joy in my heart from sitting across from one of my favorite people was the medicine my soul needed. It was truly a gift to each of us. We talked as if we were old friends. No topic was off limits. I told her a bit about my day. She told me a bit about her month. We talked about how the presence of God and the power of prayer can keep us going as the kind waitress continued to fill our coffee cups.

With a smile on her face she said, “Rachel, I am so proud of you! I wish you well.” The smile on her face said it all. Then the words hugged my heart and yet another whisper. You can’t quit!

I noticed a large traffic jam as I was driving toward the nursing home and decided I should take a different, less traveled way home. As I annoyingly approached traffic on the alternative route, I held my head in my hand rested on the door. At that moment I read these words from a billboard. “Even in this moment, Jesus cares.” Without paying much attention to it, I turned the radio on. The same song that played previous in the day was on again. The same song that spoke directly to my heart and the feelings I was trapped in. I immediately turned back to the billboard and realized God was very present in my day and the whispers were not quite whispers anymore. They were billboards!

This day also happened to be the day I attend Bible Study where we by no surprise are learning of the attacks of Satan and how to prepare ourselves to stand strong. I did not even want to go to Bible Study this morning. Remember – Ms. I Quit! Not only could I not wait to get there and share the amazing presence of God throughout my entire day, I was excited. I sent my group pictures of the billboard and a snap shot of the song on the radio. I attended Bible Study with a very changed heart and was blown away by the teachings and words shared throughout the evening.  God spoke to my heart in very transparent ways. What started out as Satan attempting to tear apart, God repaired. He left no time for me to even try to act on my foolish thoughts of giving up. He comforted me. He showed me truths. He found ways to make me see his presence and existence. But you know what? I wouldn’t have even seen His work had I not sat in silence and prayed. I could have driven right past the billboard I would have never seen otherwise. I could have not been filled up by my grandmother had I not listened to the nudge to go. Had I sat in attempts to write while licking my wounds, I would have missed it all. I would have missed God today.

Most Bible Study nights end with me kissing my son goodnight in hopes he doesn’t call me into his room again. I sit and talk with my daughter for a bit and sometimes even go for a run with my hubby. But this night my son was sound asleep in bed. The house was quiet. I was tired from answering the call of my early morning alarm, but God helped create a time and space for me to recapture the events of the day. I could not waste the precious gift. So I write these words with deepest gratitude for the love I experienced from my Father today.

I leave you with words from Priscilla Shirer tonight. I pray they bless and inspire you as they have me.

“When God’s peace is locked in your life, it will become your guide and protection. We cannot survive the storms in life without God’s peace.” – from The Armor of God

Father God thank you for your presence. Thank you for the reminders of your existence and affirmations to keep fighting when it gets hard. May we all be better at silence and prayer to grow our peace and notice you actively working in our life for comfort, guidance and to feel your protection. It is in Jesus precious name we pray. Amen.

But as I looked at everything I had worked so hard to accomplish, it was all so meaningless – like chasing the wind. There was nothing really worthwhile anymore. So I decided to compare wisdom with foolishness and madness (for who can do this better than I, the king?) I thought, “Wisdom is better than foolishness, just as light is better than darkness. For the wise can see where they are going, but fools walk in the dark.” – Ecclesiastes 2:11-14 (NLT)

Be prepared. You’re up against far more than you can handle on your own take all the help you can get, every weapon God has issued, so that when it’s all over but the shouting you’ll still be on your feet. Truth, righteousness, peace, faith, and salvation are more than words. Learn how to apply them. You’ll need them throughout your life. God’s Word is an indispensable weapon. In the same way, prayer is essential in this ongoing warfare. Pray hard and long. Pray for your brothers and sisters. Keep your eyes open. Keep each other’s spirits up so that no one falls behind or drops out. – Ephesians 6:14-18 (MSG)

And let the peace that comes from Christ rule in your hearts. For as members of one body you are called to live in peace. And always be thankful. –Colossians 3:15 (NLT)

No Hard Feelings

My church has an indoor playground for young kids like my son to play. I had a love/hate relationship with the playground until I realized the benefits for my son. He learns to play with others his age, some older and even some younger. This extra social time is important to him because he does not attend preschool. Realizing this advantage, I sit reading or working on a Bible Study while he plays and my daughter and husband serve in their respectful positions. During my son’s playtime Sunday morning, he walked up to me with a distraught and troubled look. He was sad and felt bad he hurt another little boy. He didn’t hesitate one bit when I reminded him the nice thing to do would be to apologize. I followed him as he made his way to the little boy. As we approached the little boy cried in his dad’s arms.

“I am sorry I hurt you,” my son said wholeheartedly and sincerely. The little boy stopped crying, turned to him and said, “it’s okay.” Just like that parents were smiling and little boys were happy again resulting in everyone able to walk away with no hard feelings.

As we sat down with snacks, I reinforced rules of fair play. Nodes of reassurance followed. I moved his hair to the side of his forehead and noticed he too suffered an injury. He had a large red bump beginning to protrude from his little forehead. What was misunderstood as fault began to show truth of only an accident. My son – God’s son – felt his fault over his pain; therefore, he was able to reach out and say he was sorry. He did not point fingers or try to excuse his behavior. He did not walk away brushing it off as an accident dismissing the tears. He took action to recognize his fault in the situation and followed by stepping out with acts of forgiveness.

So often we are too hot and bothered or perhaps even controlled by the hurt we’ve endured overlooking the hurt we have caused.

My son is no different than other children. I am in no way saying he is better than any other little boy on the playground.  After all, the little boy he apologized to could have returned his apology with mean and hurtful words followed by rude gestures. Instead he chose to forgive and move on with a smile. I have no doubt these boys will play again together with no mention or at least no hard feelings of the bumps and tears.

Then he said, “I tell you the truth, unless you turn from your sins and become like little children, you will never get into the Kingdom of Heaven. - Matthew 18:3

This verse in Matthew is a reminder we need to first turn from our sin rather than excuse our sin. Second it emphasizes our need to be more like children. Not childish and immature, but docile and teachable. Children learn not only because they are impressionable. They yearn to learn and want to make us happy and proud around guidelines and supervision. We need to become less so our God can become more. (John 3:30) Putting God first will transform our transgressions and heal our pain, but we have to be willing to put Him above the transgression and pain.

When we make our situations and life about the wrong people have done to us, we build ourselves up in our mind to have little or no fault. We are too blinded by the sin others have committed to see our own. We make excuses for our sins or perhaps don’t see it as sin or hurtful because it makes us feel better. Our focus is not on the pain we have caused. More importantly our focus is not on God.

Christ Jesus sacrificed his life for your sins. (Romans 5:8) He also died on the cross for the person you are most angry with. He died for the person who hurt you terribly and he even died for the person you need to apologize to. He loves us all the same. We all have access to His love and grace. How we let His forgiveness, love and grace impact our life is up to each one of us personally. It is not easy. The lies of the world so often get in the way preventing us from thinking beyond our perspective. To make it even more complicated, things like forgiveness and love are not always taught according to the Bible. When we read and start to apply what we learn, we might experience the clash because our new applications are either new to the people in our lives or our environment. Perhaps forgiveness does not go the way we thought it should because we expect too much of it. Subconsciously we may try to control the other person to act the way we think they should after we apologize. We may even sit and wallow in our feelings until they make the first move and apologize. So many reasons make it hard because Satan does not want us to forgive. Forgiveness means we are close to God and something he does not want. He will do everything he can to try and prevent the complete act of forgiveness. Our focus has to remain on God.

God will help us grow a desire to let the hurt go. He will help us cultivate a heart and words of forgiveness. God can grant peace, almost indescribably, after we release the anger with no expectation of anything in return from others.

Forgiveness and apologies do not mean everything will magically be fixed and back to awesome once the words are exchanged. So much more has to be done with a massive amount of prayer and acceptance of the Holy Spirit’s work in our lives and the lives of those involved. Forgiveness is a key step in the right direction toward more peace and respectability. When our hearts are fixated on Jesus and our desires are biblically based, action follows the willing heart for transforming results. With God anything is possible, but we have to take an active roll. We can sit and talk about how great God is and the impacts of the Holy Spirit, but then what? We can’t expect God or other people to do all the work for us to magically impact and change our life. It is up to each one of us to take the responsibility.

Don’t forget, we don’t expect children to be perfect when they learn something new. Remember you don’t start off with, nor will you reach perfection. Ease the reigns. Try.  Fall. But get back up to try again! Pray, listen, read, act.

My son could have easily been upset by the bump on his own head and the pain it caused. The other little boy could have forever been mean to my son despite the apology.

What will you do?

Pray the Holy Spirit would infuse these words for impactful change in your life.

We love each other because he loved us first. – 1 John 4:19

For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. -Romans 3:23 (NIV)

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. -1 John 1:9 (ESV)

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you. – Ephesians 4:32 (ESV)

For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others their sins, your father will not forgive your sins. - Matthew 6:14-15  (NIV)

(Not that God is telling you no, but your heart has to be right. A heart of anger is not right with the Lord.)

Lord, we pray wholeheartedly these words would be understood and taken personally. Please help us all to become wise in forgiveness to build integrity for us and those we influence. Thank you for forgiveness of my sins. Help me to share it with those who have hurt me. Help me to be honest with you about my faults. Keep me teachable to learn next steps so my application would not fall short. Please help me to recognize the clashes so I don’t take them personally followed by endurance to keep going despite the bumps and discouragement along the way. Thank you so much Father for loving me and sending your son for forgiveness. I pray these things in Jesus name. Amen.

I Surrender

As the music began, my mind became aware of each breath and beat of my heart. Swaying in the presence of the Holy Spirit, I began to sing words to my Father I so desperately needed to say to Him.

“I surrender”

Aware of each breath and heartbeat, I recognized the moment was for me. He took my focus off the others in the worship center that sang along. He cleared my mind of each family member I so often put first. Just the two of us. Feeling drained and inadequate, my loving Father was the medicine essential to my troubled soul. I was captivated by the majesty of His presence. Tears tumbled. Singing suspended. Head bowed. I leaned into God. In my weakness, I was made strong. “Rachel, hold strong. No fear, no doubt, no relationship strain or any of your worldly based anxiety is bigger than me. Because you said yes to me, I will hold you up. I have done it before and I will do it again. Remember me. Remember what I have done for you. Together we are going to do amazing things. Stay focused. I love you.”

I didn’t actually hear these words. I felt them. My words seem to fall short when used to describe my moments with God and the majesty of the Holy Spirit when He comes to me personally to strengthen and encourage me. He has this way of shifting my focus. He reminds me of His perfect love to make me feel like I have the best cheerleader. He wants me focused. He wants me ready. For this, He reminds me of truths to take my focus off my worries of unknown. As much as I try to be a Noah and just build the boat, I spend time wasted in thoughts. He frequently realigns my thoughts to be focused on Him. For example just this week, I was worried about money as we ran into yet another financial change. Oh no! What are we going to do? I can’t keep doing this! I need to do something different to help control the situation ways of stressing and thinking began to flood inside me. I scrolled over to the verse of the day on my phone and what do you know? I was reading Malachi 3:10 which says, “Bring all the tithes into the storehouse so there will be enough food in my Temple. If you do,” says the Lord of Heaven’s Armies, “I will open the windows of heaven for you. I will pour out a blessing so great you won’t have enough room to take it in! Try it! Put me to the test!”

Repeatedly God has shown His faithfulness to me. As the song continued, my tears turned to mini sobs. I was reminded of his little reminders like the one from Malachi and of times I actually surrendered to Him. Not for my part of the surrender, but for His answers and movement to constantly show He is indeed the promise keeper He says He is.

Can you see His handprint on your life?

I have experienced days when He was the only one keeping promises. My jobs have fallen short of the promises they speak of. People. Oh. My. Gosh. People have for sure not been able to follow through with promises. When I really think about it, I have not kept each promise I have made. But God! God has followed through with every single one of His promises. I read of them in the Bible, the Holy Spirit personalizes them for me and I can almost point at moments in my life where the promises came true. Not once have I found myself looking back at situations to see Him void. His handprint is on my life.

Years ago things got so bad for me I almost literally fell to pieces when my daughter left to visit her dad. I was crippled with fear and driven by anger. I thought of nothing but her wellbeing and safety when she was not with me. My new marriage started to suffer because I let the worry consume me. My out of control thoughts took me away from what was right in front of me. My job became hard because my focus was not right. The relationships surrounding me all seemed to be lacking and missing something. Blinded by my emotions, I did not see I was the missing piece to the relationships. I was giving everyone only partial of what I really had to give because ultimately my energy was lost to worry. The Holy Spirit started to tug and pull at my heart to point my focus to Christ. I had heard all about surrendering to God, but it never went any further than something I heard. I never tried. When I finally attempted to surrender my daughter to Christ, I took her back many times because the lack of control seemed too hard and frightening. My decisions were clouded and misguided by lies when God was already so beautifully in control. Of course I continued to struggle and situations resulted negatively so I ultimately gave her back to the Lord and left her with Him. I was free - almost instantly. Sure I had to refocus my thoughts to the surrender when my mind automatically began to worry, but I had a security in Christ. He loved her. He watched over her when I could not. He comforted her when in ways I couldn’t. His Spirit could be with her to give her wisdom and guidance surpassing my capabilities. He moved in ways I could not to protect her. I realized she needed more than I was capable of and moved aside to let God be God. Bad situations started to sprout different signs of positivity and change began in more than just me.

The intimacy felt with God in church during the song reminded me I needed to surrender my doubts so I could better answer His calling. I said to him, “Lord, I surrender the hold the lies and ways of the world have on me. Help me to be strong in only you so I am able to be a voice for you.” The song continued and I felt as if I was held in His arms. I began to sing again and my heart and mind where open to hear a great sermon to only further the conversation we just shared.

Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Proverbs 3:5-6

Lord, worry is in us all - some more than others (hand raised). Help us to live out Proverbs 3:5 in our everyday thoughts and decisions. We know your ways are better, but it is so hard to let go of control. May we stand firm in verse 6 and have blinders removed to see your promise play out in our life. Thank you for your son Jesus. Thank you for your love and grace. It is in Jesus name we pray. Amen.

Close your eyes for a moment and reflect on Him as your Promise Keeper.

Read the verses below. Pray the Holy Spirit would personalize them for your soul so you trust more, worry less and release control to your Wonderful and Mighty Savior. 

Yet if you devote your heart to him and stretch out your hands to him,

if you put away the sin that is in your hand and allow no evil to dwell in your tent,

then, free of fault, you will lift your face;

you will stand firm and without fear. –Job 11:13-15 (NIV)

Then Jesus went to work on his disciples. “Anyone who intends to come with me has to let me lead. You’re not in the driver’s seat; I am. Don’t run from suffering; embrace it. Follow me and I’ll show you how. Self-help is no help at all. Self-sacrifice is the way, my way, to finding yourself, your true self. What kind of deal is it to get everything you want but lose yourself? What could you ever trade your soul for? – Matthew 16:24-26 (MSG)

Be still in the presence of the Lord, and wait patiently for him to act.

Don’t worry about evil people who prosper or fret about their wicked schemes. – Psalm 37:7 (NLT)

Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength. – Deuteronomy 6:4-5 (NIV)